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It’s not a sign of weakness, but of strength.

Last week Dan asked, “What advice do you have for addressing the insecurity I feel that my team can’t see the value I’m adding?”

You sent in some answers, which I want to share. I also want to share my thoughts.

But first, I’ll identify the two meanings of the question:

  1. How do I reduce my feelings of insecurity?
  2. How do I show my team the value I add?

Some of you wrote in about #1 – how to feel more secure in your job. These suggestions included:

  1. Create more feedback loops with your team (your team, your boss, your peers, your customers, etc.)
  2. Discuss what your team needs from you in 1-1 meetings, so you can understand what they are hoping for
  3. Shift your mindset about the value of management

Some of you wrote in about #2 – how to show your team the value you add. These suggestions include:

  1. Discuss your Top 3 priorities in 1-1s
  2. Give updates about what you’re working on in daily standup
  3. Be open about what’s frustrating, and what’s great, about your job

All these are great – thanks for writing in!

Ultimately, your insecurity is about you, not them.

If you fear that they don’t respect you, value you, or appreciate you – take steps to get more information, and then act on it.

Remember, – most people assume their boss doesn’t care what they think or feel. They believe you’re confident because that’s how bosses look from the outside. Just because they aren’t saying much, doesn’t mean they aren’t thinking much.

The more human you are, the more they will trust you.

Transparency isn’t a sign of weakness, but strength.

There’s no shame in being transparent, and even vulnerable about your insecurities.

Everyone wants a boss they can relate to – and we can all relate to insecurities because we’re all insecure sometimes.

Take care, and be real.

Best,
Marcus

P.S. – How useful was this to you today?

About Marcus Blankenship

Where other technical coaches focus on process or tools, I focus on the human aspects of your Programmer to Manager transition. I help you hire the right people, create the right culture, and setup the right process which achieves your goals. Managing your team isn't something you learned in college. In fact, my clients often tell me "I never prepared for this role, I always focused on doing the work". If you're ready to improve your leadership, process and team, find out how I can help you.

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